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Sunday, September 25, 2011

JOKE

Deadly PJs.... All New Ones....

Commit suicide at your own risk...

Gulshan Grover is riding a bike at the velocity of light.

On the way he offers a lift to a stranger.

Stranger: 'Sir, can I know your name please'

Gulshan : 'I am Gulshan Grocer'

Stranger : Grocer? Sure you dont mean Gulshan Grover??

Gulshan: No it is Grocer.

Now tell me why did Gulshan say so...

Scroll down for the ultimate PJ

Further,,,

Little further...

ANS: Because at the speed of light V=C

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Ek baar ek aadmi ek auto mein baithta hai aur ghar le jaane ko bolta

Hai..

Autowala, yeh dekhkar ki aadmi sheher mein naya hai,bahut ghumak phira

Ke le jaata hai aur bahut charge kar deta hai.

Ghar pahunchte pahunchte bahut der ho jaati hai aur andhera ho jaata

Hai.

Aadmi pehle se hi bahut frustrated hai aur ghar jaake dekhta hai ki

Bijli nahi hoti hai.

Par aadmi ko sab kuch saaf saaf dikhayee deta hai. Kaise???

Kyonki autowala aadmi ko ULLOO bana deta hai aur usko raat ko sab kuch

Saaf saaf dikhta hai.

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Ek Gaaon me Seeta aur Geeta do Behane rehati hai.

Dono ko ek baar nadi paar karanee hoti hai.

Seeta nadee me kudati hai aur tairake jaatee hai.

Geeta pool ke upar se chalake jaati hai.

Phir bhi Gaaon ke log bolate hai ki Seeta Geeta se jyada intellegent

Hai.

Kyon?

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Kyon?

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Socho.

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Nahi pata?

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Kyonki

Seeta ko Geeta se S.S.C ke exam me jyada marks milate hai.

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Teacher: 'A' for?

Student: Apple !!!

Teacher: Jor se bolo

Student: JAI MATA DI

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Ek baar ek aadmi ne badi tapasya ki.

Shivji khush .

Prakat hue ...

Bole ...

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Puttar maang ...

Maang kya chahiye tujhey !

Bakth utha ...

Bole shivji ...

Mujhey to aap sirf ek guitar de do !

Shivji bole kaisa gadha hai ?

Unhone kaha ... puttar ...

Tuney badi achchi tapsya ki hai ...

Kuch bada maang !

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Wo fir bola ... nahi ji ..mujhey to aap guitar hi do

Shivji ne phir samajhaya .. abey .. kuch dhang ka maang ... !

Par wo to ada hi hua tha ... bola nahi ... aap to mujhey guitar hi do !

Shivji usey bade pyaar se khopch me lekar samjhane lage ... bole ..yaar

TU

Kuch aur maang .. guitar

Na maang ...

Wo bola ... nahi nahi nahi !! mujhey sirf guitar hi chahiye ... ab

Shivji gussey main aa gaye ... boley ,(scroll down)

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Saale .. agar guitar mere paas hota to main ye damaru kyo bajata

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And this is the latest one.... shayad padaa ho pehle but phir bhi

Enjoy....................

1) Smoking

2) Drinking

3) Charas

4) Ganja

5) Chicken

6) Mutton

7) Oily food

 Masala

9) Sleep & obesity

10) Pollution

=

Heart Attack

Matlab

Scrolll down

DUS bahane karke le gaye DIL !!

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Do you know why the name of Madras was replaced by Chennai???

Think......

Think..

Bit more.......

Because...a Madrassi wears lungi and there is no zip means

Chen..nai...

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What's the opposite of "Dominoes"Huh

Think

Think

Think

Think

Think

Think

Think

Think

Think

Think

Think

Think

think

think

think

think

think

think

think

think

think

think

think

think

think

think

think

think

think

think

think

think

think

think

think

think

think

think

think

think

think

think

think

think

think

tired of thinking???

Well the answer is "Domi doesn't know"

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Whats the opposite of "Pizza Hut"

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okei don't kill me "Pizza Hutna math"

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Acha last one...............

Ok whats the opp of venky's..

venlocks...

(now,now,dont bang ur head plz..)

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What is the opposite of Subramnium Swamy?

Subramanium Didn't See Me.

How do they start a road race in Tamil Nadu?

Ready....Steady.....PO

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Why did the visitor to the Gujju home run away when

He was offered tea?

Because the Gujju said he would serve snakes with it.

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What is a Gujju picnic called?

A snake in the grass.

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Why did the American get scared of the Gujju?

Because he said 'Sue kare chhe.'

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What did the Gujju! mean when he said," Maro dikro

STATES ma gayon?"

His son failed in statistics.

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Maro dikro Dubai gayo?

My son drowned.

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A guy is traveling in a deluxe car in the desert. He wants to take a

Bath, but he hasn 't got a soap and there is no water anywhere around

....

What can he do?

->>He will integrate his d-lux car to get Lux + c (constant of

Integration) Using the lux soap he will take bath in the 'c '.

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One day a man calls his wife from his IDEA mobile

His call gets cross connected to some other lady.They still keep on

Talking..they start liking each other..and finally they get married.

What MORAL do u get???

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An IDEA can change your wife.

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Ek baar teen ants jarahi thee.......

To unhein cheenee(sugar) ki bori milti hie to pahlee do cheenti to

Usmein se cheenee ke dane utha leti hei but ek nahi uthati batao kyu

............

kyunki

kyunki

Use diabetes thee

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A man went to a STD/ISD/PCO SHOP and slapped the operator twice.



Guess why ?

because there it was written "Number dial karne se pehele do lagae"

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whats difference between a man jumping from 1st floor and a man jumping

from 10th floor?

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former goes (hit) aaaaaaaaa

later goes aaaaaaaaa (hit)

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Other than being fruits, what is common between an Apple and an Orange?

Think......

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socho socho

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the answer is ..........

They Both Are Not a Banana !!



> Juhi , Rekha , sushma and jaya are 4 friends.
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> They all got marriage proposal from Shah Rukh, Salman, Aamir nad Saif.
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> Kyunki....Juhi, rekha ,jaya aur sushma...
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> Sabki pasand NIRMAAAAAAAAAAAAA

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